While I was speaking aloud about ways to describe Pete Goodliffe, Jez Higgins suggested I use a recent comment from accu-general, ‘blond, balding, barefoot’. While accurate these aren’t a particularly nice way to describe Pete, although barefoot is at least accurate and not disparaging, like the other two.
When I think of Pete four things instantly spring to mind, his friendly personality, his bare feet, Cambridge, and curry. I have had many a curry and more than a few beers with Pete Goodliffe, both in Oxford and on occasion in Cambridge. When I think about Pete technically, his sound and solid technical knowledge and advice stand out. He has a lot of experience in software development and not only does he make it work for him to generate great software, he is always happy to help others and pass on the knowledge where he can (sorry Pete, I won’t mention the book).
I very narrowly missed out on working with Pete a few years ago, which was a shame because I would have learnt a lot.
So here I am, stuck on a desert island with nothing but the birds for company. Still, it could be worse; at least the conversation won’t get too geeky. I can’t help but wonder what kind of calamitous event catapulted me from my secure (if dull) office chair to this remote tropical location. Probably one of those stories that no one will ever believe back home, but it almost certainly involved a few whiskies, an ill-placed wager, and a temperamental particle physicist. Curse you CERN and Speyside!
At least I’ve got the decent weather. Let’s just hope global warming doesn’t shrink my new island home even further. Perhaps this stack of improbably placed books would provide me a small tower to sit on if the tide does indeed rise.
For my company on this forsaken isle, the gods of Fate and Calamity [PJG: I’ve never been described like that before!] have seen fit to bestow upon me four programming books, one novel, and two albums.
The computer books seem sadistic, cruel and somewhat ironic, as they haven't left me a computer [PJG: You didn’t ask!]. If they had, I’d ram it full if e-books, anyway. At least I’m good for toilet paper for a while. The CDs are just plain torture, as the swines didn’t leave me a CD player [PJG: See previous comment]. I’ll have to fashion one from a coconut tree and an albatross. Or just whistle.
So that means it’s only the novel that’s useful, then. Better pick a big one..
So what computer books should I chose? I could select four books I have always wanted to read, but never got round to buying. I could select four random books on a whim that might be interesting. But given that I won’t be able to fiddle with a computer any more (unless I find myself a convenient passing rescue party), I may as well select four classic books that have enthused me in days gone by. Books that will help me reminisce about the good old days when I had hair, when keys were rubbery, and when computers had rainbows on them.
And that is indeed my first choice. I’ll re-read First Steps with Your ZX Spectrum by Carolyn Hughes. I haven’t picked this book up in about 30 years, but it was my first ever programming book, and the thing that first gave me a passion for programming. I digested the entire book before I ever got near a computer. It has immense personal significance to me. And it also had pretty cartoon pictures of computers telling you what to do. I’ve not read a book like it since.
In a fit of nostalgia, I recently bought that same book on Amazon. For three pence. Seriously. Three pence. The postage was two orders of magnitude more than the book itself. That really does show how the value of knowledge decreases over time.
The next book providing this stranded programmer with a stroll down memory lane is Booch’s classic Object Oriented Analysis and Design With Applications. I may be developing a theme here, as I recall this book also had a number of interesting cartoons in it. But that’s not why I’m choosing it. I first encountered OOAD at university and it provided an incredibly clear, well reasoned and enjoyable overview of quality design techniques and the application of OO principles to software design. It was a genuinely great introduction to the philosophy of software design. It is also unusual, being one of the minority of hard-cover programming books
I’ve ever owned. So it might be useful for hitting wild animals with.
This book pre-dates the quadrilateral joys of UML, and I always loved Booch’s OO diagramming style. He represented classes by clouds; simply because they were easier to draw on the back of a napkin. The man’s a genius.
The Pragmatic Programmer by Andy Hunt and Dave Thomas will be my third book. It’s a wonderful clear, entertaining, and motivating discourse of the practice of programming from a personal and social standpoint. It’s the kind of book that I love to read, and one of the few books that you can read over and over again, because you actually want to.
It’s full of sage, refreshing advice.
However, it could have been vastly improved with a few carefully placed cartoons.
My last techie book is a hard call. Of the numerous books that have challenged and/or aided me in my career I’d struggle to chose just one. I could spend some serious
time digesting a hardcore C++ tome, like Bjarne’s TCPPPL, or any of Meyer’s or Sutter’s excellent C++ references. I could pick up a development process book, like Beck’s eXtreme Programming Explained (I remember that one being a very fresh read when I first opened it). Or I could drill into any of a number of design books, like the classic (and painfully obvious) Gang of Four tome or a number of later pattern languages. Perhaps something more recent would be a good companion like Michael Feathers’ legacy code book.
So I think I’ll select Sam’s Teach Yourself C++ in 24 Hours and be done with it. It’s bound to be wonderful nonsense, and is certain to produce an emotional response. Can’t be any worse than a Schildt book, can it? I think I’ll need the laughs.
Now to ship those books securely to my remote prison I’ll need to pack them carefully. I wonder if anyone will notice if I wrap them in a stack of ACCU magazines?
Presuming that I’m supplied with standard desert island accoutrements such as a copy of the Bible and the complete works of Shakespeare (perhaps with an accompanying infinite number of monkeys on an infinite number of typewriters – hopefully on their own island) then my choice of novel will be a collection of C.S. Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia. I’ve always had a soft spot for these books (as with much of Lewis’ other writing). I love the Christian symbolism in them, and have started getting into them with my children, so these books would bring back a selection of old and new memories as I’m stranded here.
It just remains for me to make the choice of two albums. I’m an avid music lover with a wide and somewhat eclectic taste. However, should my soundtrack for a tropical adventure be something relaxing like a Sigur Ross album, something by Lamb, or Air’s chilled Moon Safari, or perhaps something more upbeat like a Kings of Leon or Killers album? My choice will instead be the awesome Flaming Lip’s masterwork Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots, and Delirious’ Mezamorphis. Both of these are epic, dense, layered, meaningful and rewarding listens.
So that’s it. Spare a thought for me marooned here, and pray I don’t suffer from a coconut allergy or sun stroke.